I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes when I was 10 years old, on August 31, 2004. My diagnosis was similar to a lot of other people, with all of the classic symptoms: drinking a lot of water (insane amounts of water!), peeing a lot, lack of energy, and losing weight. My mom took me to the doctor where I was sent for blood work (the first of many) and had a blood sugar of 44.4 mmol/dg (800 mg/dl). I was giving my first injection of insulin later that day and finally slept through the night for the first time in months. What followed were daily check-ins at the hospital for a few weeks where I was taught everything about glucose monitors, insulin and syringes, and optimal food and nutrition. It was a lot for a 10 year old, but I remember actually feeling moments of interest and excitement. I was never particularly squeamish, so the needles didn’t bother me. As a middle child and the only girl in a family of five, I was suddenly receiving a lot of attention and some great care packages, so it didn’t seem all that bad! I also loved being told that I was brave and getting special attention from the doctors, my family, and eventually teachers and other students. I’ve always loved learning, and I remember asking my parents to order books about diabetes to be sent to relatives in the USA for them to mail to me because they couldn’t be ordered in Canada (pre-Amazon days, if you can believe it!).

The novelty wore off quickly though, and I was a rebellious child when it came to my diabetes. I was always fairly independent, but being diagnosed right before becoming a teenager was tough. I demanded autonomy over my body and jumped right into managing my diabetes (with parental supervision, of course), however it was likely more responsibility than I was ready for. I was adamant that diabetes wouldn’t hold me back and I hated being told to prioritize it over all else in my life. I often ignored or fought with my diabetes team and parents, something that further fueled my hatred of living with this disease. I would feel complete dread in the days leading up to a diabetes clinic appointment, knowing that I would be scolded for my lack of management. I wanted nothing more than to be left alone, and so I regularly left my diabetes alone to manage itself, only doing what I absolutely needed to get by. By the time I was 16, I had a reputation at my diabetes clinic for being a “non-compliant” patient, a label which meant “bad” in my eyes. It also really hurt me because I did feel like I was managing it the best that I could at the time with everything a teenager had to deal with, even if nobody believed me. From the ages of 12–20, my A1C fluctuated from 7.5 to 13, often swinging multiple percentage points in a matter of months based on how much attention I felt like giving it (my motivation would also swing wildly). My teenage and young adult years were rocky, to say the least. 

This isn’t a sad story, though! I passionately believe that I needed those rough years to learn and grow and stumble my way through living with this disease before ending up in a better place, and I’m happy to report that I did (or am, as it’s always an ongoing thing). As I approach my twenty-year anniversary of being diagnosed, I now have an A1C of 5.2% and zero complications (which is not entirely dependent on your blood sugar management and can often happen even with great blood sugars, which is important to note). My care team would often make comments about how I would never make it to my 30th birthday without complications if I kept my management behaviour up, but I’m happy to share that after putting in years of work figuring out my body’s patterns and needs with diabetes, I now have no indications anywhere in my body of T1D complications. It has been a long and winding journey, but I’ve finally figured out how to make diabetes fit within my life, not the other way around. I never thought it was possible to feel this good and have stable blood sugars with T1D, but I’m doing it and I’m proud of myself.  

I wanted to create this blog/resource to share all of the info and experiences I’ve had over the years: the good, the bad, and definitely the ugly. I love the online diabetes community so much, but I’ve found that sometimes the loudest voices are those who have never been on the receiving end of the “bad patient” label. It can be hard to relate to others who are thriving with their management when you have an A1C of 13% or are struggling with intense diabetes burnout. In fact, until a few years ago I completely avoided any diabetes social media accounts or communities because I felt I didn’t belong without an A1C under 8% or the latest and greatest diabetes technology. 

While I don’t claim to know everything or have all the answers, I have been through some hard times and I’m sitting on the other side (for now, at least!), which is somewhere I truly never thought I’d be able to say when I was experiencing my hardest days. This isn’t a before-and-after thing, it’s just my honest thoughts and experience (sometimes not fully doctor-approved…shhh!) as it relates to what worked for me, what didn’t, and what I wish I knew earlier. I used to be paired up as a mentor for newly diagnosed people with T1D, but once I passed my early twenties I was no longer paired with people because I was too old. I miss sharing my thoughts and helping others through the struggles, so I decided to start this little passion project. If it can help anyone at all to not feel so alone in their experiences, it will be worth it. While my experience is with type 1 diabetes, I believe a lot of life with diabetes can be shared regardless of an official diagnosis, so everyone is welcome here!

If you have any comments, thoughts, suggestions, or feedback, please drop me a line. I’d love to hear from you, and I’m cheering you on, wherever you are in your diabetes journey!